Surprise, surprise!
Just as I was about to box it up and take it to the post office earlier, I get an e-mail with what? A fed-ex label.
Since I was somehow wrong in thinking the mail would do, I am now to print a fedex label and ship it back.
As luck would have it, I have neither a functioning printer OR address labels to feed it.
So I am to spend - what? $120 on a printer and labels to ship dead a dead piece of $30 electronics back? Call me crazy - but, NO.
Oh, and their wonderful software has refused to even open for several days and has now disappeared entirely.
Did I mention the company is constantly spamming me at least other day? Yeah.
Like I said early on, I wont allow this to become a fiasco. I totally refuse to spend any more money or time on it, and as I suspected, the whole thing is garbage.
As such, the best location for it is the dumpster and that's where the hardware is, since even IF I did get good hardware back (and there is no guarantee since they have what? No means to test it.) It still wouldn't run without the software that vanished.
To recap: About two weeks after my order and about 80 bucks later, I have no software (it was buggy anyway - but where did it go?) , A useless controller, a dead appliance box and some sort of plug-in heater for a thermostat resting comfortably in the dumpster behind my house, exactly where it belongs.
Now all I need is to block the spam they keep sending me and wash my hands of it once and for all.
I am done here, and thanks to those who helped.